It’s New: ‘Organo-Genito’ Business

There’s a new shop in town. Its name: ‘Fresh G. Organs’, and the motto: Welcome all for Juicy, Long and MMeaty organs!

Yea, that‘s how Kenyans are creative businesswise. After roasting maize and sweet-potatoes to extinction they have shifted to more enterprising and lively goodies. And I guess clients’ appetite for the new item will go up sooner than later.

After the ‘organic’ news, the nation has been treated with the past few days, wild thinking is necessary, after all private organs have for long been attended to privately but now they are out in public. Therefore, discussing publicly such visible organisms is not strange.

The name is out already. So let’s beef it up with a good menu list. First, the attendants will put on aprons bearing a huge graphic of the organ and below it: Want them? They are here in plenty; small, medium and huge. Welcome one welcome all, thank you!
Entering the smelly dungeon, obviously at a corner on Moi Avenue-it has to be in busy road- the servants will guide customers in establishing their weight and lengths; and they better be right because they might lose business to a next competitor who is more figurative and forthcoming.

Of course colour will be another determinant. Like whether they are ‘blue’, ‘yellow’, black, ‘red’, brown, colourless etc. Sample this. Customer: Waiter, a reddish organ please. Waiter: Red? No, they are over, blackish? Customer: yea, I like a black one too, big.

Anyhow don’t worry about colour though. It would not matter much because prices will be fixed.
Prices. Just, like 2k for a single, say medium, but an addition sh200 for each extra cylinder. But they can be reduced to smaller portions to fit market demands. Half goes for sh999, and quarter sh501. No other price for the cylinders as they are no more when slashed.

When it gets to hawking it becomes more interesting.
Moto, moto, moto! A sweaty-faced hawker will definitely shout along Tom Mboya Street, or better still baridi, baridi, imetoka fridge saa hizi, another more desperate one will harangue bystanders.

Bargaining will not be a laughing matter. With that serious face, a customer will harass the seller with lower price as s/he tosses the organ up and down. Dissatisfied with the weight, the buyer will carefully put it down and test another. Satisfied s/he will ask for it to be wrapped with a piece of a newspaper and a transparent polythene paper before disappearing to Bus Station or Kencom, organ in the pocket. Business over.

Don’t be surprised and never ask what G and the extra M means in the name. Just get in and let the attendants do their thing. All the best!

Just by the Way...
*Ok, Ok , this business portends extinction for none other than us, men. At this rate we’ll go where dinosaurs went unless some serious action is taken to stop this.

Disclaimer: Engage in this business at your own risk.